YES! I could and I should!

There’s something utterly terrifying about withdrawing your child from public school.  We’ve been taught that the teachers have been certified to be “good teachers”, that the schools are safe and that our children are receiving the best care while attending.  Every comment from any nay-sayer runs through your head: “he won’t get enough socialization”, “are you sure you know how to teach him everything he needs to know?”, “do you really have the patience to have your child with you ALL THE TIME?”

TERRIFYING!!

But the schools aren’t necessarily safe; the teachers aren’t always “good”.  As to the rest, I’ve struggled with those questions continually. 

After observing BJ’s class and realizing that we needed another option, I immediately started looking for a homeschool group that might be able to offer help and advice.  I attended a meeting of the local homeschool network and met several ladies that gladly answered as many of my questions as I could think of at the moment.  Then something happened that really set my mind at ease about the “socialization” question.  A young woman, probably about 16 years old, came over to Lori, the lady I was chatting with.  This young lady politely waited until she was acknowledged, said “excuse me” and started a conversation with Lori.  All the while she stood or sat with poise, looked Lori in the eyes, used correct grammar and showed respect to Lori and myself.  This was NOT the scene I would have expected from most public school kids I’d been around, where a conversation was likely to be short, surly and full of slang.  And when I looked around, I noticed that just about all of the kids showed this same level of maturity and social ability, at least for their age.  Score one for homeschooling!

So, at the end of his 3^rd grade year, I withdrew BJ from Public School.  We spent the summer doing some “bridging” activities, trying to figure out where he was academically, what he needed and how I might best be able to meet those needs for him.  I knew that one of our largest hurdles was going to be the reading.  We had learned the previous winter that BJ had some eye focusing issues that needed “Eye Therapy”.  However at $800 per month for almost two years, I had to admit that covering basic necessities was more important.  So we spent a lot of time simply reading.  We pretty much started over with Primers, trying to re-build his confidence and possibly fill in some blanks in his skills.

By the end of the summer, I had realized that BJ was probably a little above grade level on Math.  He was on level with history and science, and could comprehend and remember most everything that was read TO him. And his reading and writing were about mid-1^st grade level.  I found a boxed-curriculm that was heavy on the reading so we could really push that, and much of the reading was subject related so he could be getting a deeper understanding of what he was learning in history.  I chose a 1^st grade level set (bought off craigslist for half the price of retail!) and fourth grade math and science separately.

It didn’t take me long to start worrying again about what I was doing.  BJ didn’t want to do his work, it felt like all I was doing was reading to him or listening to him read all day long, and we were both getting frustrated.  I found facebook friends to get support from, chatted with the ladies in our homeschool group and pushed on.

By the end of the 4^th grade year we were still fighting, but BJ was now reading at a 3^rd grade level! And he hadn’t fallen any farther behind in history, math or science, like had been beginning to happen in public school. Best of all, he was regaining self confidence and no longer hated school. Yay, us!

And then came an “ah-hah!” moment:

We were attending “Carver Days” at the George Washington Carver Monument and stopped at the Civil War Re-enactor’s display.  They had several old guns and a knowledgeable, friendly man willing to answer lots of questions.  We had just read about how Eli Whitney had made assembly line style guns for the first time, making many guns from a single model.  We were able to look at the guns and discuss which were individually made, which were assembly line, which were flint-lock and so-forth.  BJ was able to discuss the differences with me and the expert with a good amount of knowledge.  If I hadn’t been homeschooling him, I wouldn’t have known to use this opportunity to reinforce what he’d just learned in history!  BOOM!  Angels were singing choruses in my ears!  It was suddenly like all the sweat and tears of the last year had really been worth it!

We recently started our fifth year of homeschool.  BJ is now in the 8^th grade and has no interest in ever returning to public school.  It’s still a constant struggle to get him do his work.  He still struggles with his reading. I still struggle with feelings of inadequacy as a teacher (and sometimes as a parent!) But we’ve both come to love the experience as a whole and I am so glad that I decided “YES! I can and should do this!”